The Sound of Connection
On a recent Saturday afternoon, as I lay on my cozy couch by the window, it started raining. Rain is rare in Southern California, so with a fire in the hearth and large raindrops pummeling the pool, I gently closed my eyes. My cat, Claire, curled up around my neck, and my dog, Stella, lay at my feet.
I finally slowed down enough to remember a recent song recommendation from someone I deeply admire. They recommended David Draiman's version of Simon & Garfunkel's “The Sound of Silence.” It was filmed on The Conan O’Brien show in 2016, with a 15-piece orchestra. Do yourself a favor. Take a moment. Turn up the volume. Watch it through to the end.
It’s the same words as the original, yet the meaning suddenly becomes crystal clear because of the singer’s sound and intensity. This song was written in the 1960s, yet the concepts of people talking without communicating, hearing without listening, feeling a strange loneliness even in a crowd, and a society increasingly incapable of connection are completely relevant today. Perhaps, even more so. The technology that promised to connect the world seems intent on destroying our human connection.
Connecting When You Speak
If you are the one talking in a meeting and all you are thinking about is remembering what you want to say, you are missing the point.
How do your listeners feel when you talk to them? You are talking to humans, and humans connect to humor or emotion. If they see an image in their minds, you will stimulate memory and emotion, which is what you want.
Good music makes you feel something. A good movie will make you feel something. Movies aren’t going anywhere because they tap into both at once. Visual imagery and sound, and bam, you can tap right into the listener’s mind and make them feel.
So why, in business conversations, do people focus only on being thorough, not forgetting what they want to say, and coming across as subject-matter experts? These are typical concerns, yet they do nothing to engage the listener’s mind.
If you are reading this and thinking you can’t do this because…?” I ask that you get curious. A great motto from the improv world is: We Can If. What needs to be in place for you to connect emotionally when you speak, even in a business environment?
I come from a career in the arts. I am used to feeling something when people are onstage. In a business setting, the moments where mistakes happen are usually the most alive on the stage. People shift from trying to do something to responding to what is. Those are usually my favorite parts, when the stage comes alive.
Take a risk. Be the one person in the meeting that gets people to feel something. Yes, you have business content to deliver, and you are delivering it to a human wired to connect.